Day 2

I can't flake out on the second day already, even though I came quite close. I'm blogging from my phone so there really is no excuse. Man, 30 days is a long time...

My Nanny was sick this week and came back to work today looking a little worse for wear: pale, cold sores and a weird look in her eyes like she was overmedicated. I wanted to send her home but she said she was fine. But there was no way I was leaving Elijah with her. I spoke to her about what was going on, and she was open with me about going for all the necessary tests and that they were all negative. I told her that I was worried and that I felt she was not looking after herself and that may be this job was too stressful on her health...
In the past 5 years I must have been through about 7 nannies or more. I am very fussy and we live in a tiny 3 - bedroom flat and I can't stand people in my space for too long. I have really tried with the last 3 though and I thought I might have this one for a long time.
The reality is that I'll have 3 kids soon and I need a Nanny that's good at her job and is in 100% health, I can't have someone like this around my children and her and Elijah are in close proximity of each other all day everyday. It is so hard to find good help. Well, for me it is and it makes me super stressed. We are house hunting at the moment which means are expenses are about to increase and life is about to get that much more difficult. I am finally starting to feel a part of the family business and I am trying to give it my all but my kids will always come first and when things like this happen I know my number 1 priority to be home with them. But I still need to work, I can't stay home and get paid but I can't be at work and worry about my children all day.
So, I've decided to send Elijah to Noah's  school from Tuesday, 3 times a week, until the end of the year for my own piece of mind. I know it's going to take some big adjustment from his side, just today, he bawled buckets of tears when I left him with Noah's class so I could talk to the school secretary - I wonder what it will be like when I leave. But at least I know he will be safe and if need be Noah can pop in to say hi from his classroom.
Let's see how this pans out...